What is a cognitive distortion?

I know nothing. If i were on some talk show I would fall apart trying to explain anything about anything. All I can do is try to help people feel a bit less miserable through pictures and sound. I do not make films. I make things that move and have sounds, but they are not films as they have become thought of in this country, for the last 50 years at least: see spot run. I can’t make those sorts of films. Primarily because of budget. If I were to raise a budget, I would have to make concessions to someone. I tried that (making a “real” film) and it was the most filthy experience I have ever endured, and I will never go down that road again.

Cognitive distortions, as I understand them, are the dark filters in front of your eyes that show you things that are more than likely not true, and if they were in fact true: who cares? You can’t control events in your life, but you can control how you react to them. All our films are about this idea. Does Idiot X makes you angry? How do you deal with Idiot X?

I will now start to roll out terms I heard uttered by not the best therapists, or in cheap self-help books (with the magic marker stripe across the outside of the pages). I am sharing what they meant to me, and only the things that cleared away my own cognitive distortions and turned me from a shut-in who feared all people to a person who can in fact leave the house, does so, but would still prefer to stay home and avoid people. I don’t like most people. The difference is, my reasons are usually valid: people in this country care about money above all else, by-in-large. Not all people, just the ones I run into. People are obsessed with sex. I avoid it. People are obsessed with procreation and some “American Dream” that does not exist. Freedom, happiness and a good nights sleep is happiness. That is all I want. People I know think I am a space alien because I do not crave, nor am I driven by this “American Dream” sold to us by Madison Ave. and Silicon Valley.

Staring at your phone, “talking” to people when there are actual people in the room with you. “Active shooter” is a term I hear nearly every day on the TV shows I watch. It’s normalized. Sickness has been normalized, while kindness has been rendered a pipe dream.

So all the films we make are about all of these things. They are an attempt to give you some time and space to leave a world where sickness has been normalized.

Many of the films have “graphic” nudity. I mean, again, this term “graphic” is idiotic. The term pornography has been defined and legislated by men, most of whom are religious zealots, deeply corrupt and, best of all, selective with their ethics. The rest of this “Community Standards” nonsense trotted out by social media giants is done to make more money. It has nothing to do with “Community Standards.”

Sex sells. Not a shocker. But how you sell it matters to us. Men are not taught how to treat women. They are not taught about equality. They are sold the “battle of the sexes” idea. It’s nonsense. It’s another concept created by men to suppress the rights of women.

So, that is what these films are about.

I work with a woman, Collibrina, who taught me a ton about my own religion-induced shame regarding my own sexuality. The bottom line: the body should never be a source of shame, and adults who display it, however they wish and with whomever they wish, if they are not hurting themselves, others or breaking the law…there should be no shame. Men create this shame. Men who are afraid to burn in hell if they don’t do what God says, via a book also written by men, translated by men and read by men. Words that suppress women. I don’t care about it. I avoid sex, but sex matters to people, and it used to matter to me, so it’s worth looking into as someone making “films.”

I’ll say “films” moving forward to make it easier, but I can’t stress enough that we are not literal animals, and we are, in fact, animals. That is what all our “films” are about.

4x5 paper negative from the film “I Love Being Lonely”

4x5 paper negative from the film “I Love Being Lonely”

Christopher KontoesComment